150 Pound Milestone Reached!
Aug. 30, 2018
YAHOO!!! Today is a milestone day! When I weighed myself this morning, I was GIDDY to see that I've achieved a goal I've been slugging away to reach (since hitting my last milestone, 3 months ago).
I've now lost a total 150 lbs., which is 2 pounds short of what Keith currently weighs! The last time I posted news on my weight loss was May 25, and I had lost 135 lbs. That was equal to Alison's body weight, plus 5 lbs extra. It has taken me just over 3 months to lose 15 lbs, which is far slower than I'd like, but the main thing is that it's still going the right direction. Besides, even when weight loss slows down, time still flies!
The last few months have been more challenging because I had a hysterectomy surgery and have been transitioning back from a strictly liquid diet to regular foods (I was on Optifast since Dec. 11). Therefore, food choices and amounts have required more thought and effort on my part. Some days, I ate a little more than I should have (or the wrong things) and undid all the progress I had made the previous days. It was a lot of back and forth, but overall, I'm still making headway and feeling proud.
I also feel physically great! Here are some things I've noticed: I have much better flexibility; I can now cross my legs like a lady lol and even sit Indian-style cross-legged, which I don't think I've done since I was a kid, AND it's actually comfortable! I can reach my arms around my back to do up my bra strap (I used to only wear front-closing bras for that reason) and I can scratch my own itchy back so much better. When I go into a store, I no longer immediately look for a shopping cart to use for support to take some of the pressure off my ankles. I stroll around the store independently and for a much longer time - shopping has become much more enjoyable. When I look in the mirror, I love what I see - I'm thankful that I can visually notice the changes in me, as some people who've lost weight always see themselves at their heaviest due to "body dysmorphia." I now care more about what I wear and am drawn more to bright colors that bring attention to myself, rather than trying to camouflage myself from being noticed. I'm not too hot and sweating all the time, which makes it possible to wear a wider variety of clothing styles. After many years of not having the energy/give-a-darn to wear make-up, I'm now doing it any time I go out. None of these things seem like such a huge effort as they used to. I'm finding it easier to de-clutter and organize my house because for some reason, I'm not so emotionally attached to possessions and don't find decision-making so difficult.
I'm steadily more aware that any time I put food/drink into my mouth, it really is a choice with consequences. You truly can't get away with anything! It will show up on the scale, and quickly! I ask myself, for a few moments of food joy, am I willing to pay the price - an inevitable delay in reaching my goals? Or would I rather reap the rewards? When I choose to delay, I'm back on the slippery slope of procrastination and all out heading back to where I came from. Do I want to return to physical pain in my knees and ankles, being out of breath when walking the length of a corridor, the anxiety and embarrasment of not liking how I look, not fitting into chairs, or being judged by others? Nope. But even knowing this, it's still hard sometimes.
I think the biggest thing that allowed me to start succeeding, was changing how I deal with my mistakes (because, let's face it, I'm going to keep on making them - I'm human). It's about how I think of myself and how I talk to myself and how I move forward after making a mistake. I used to be self-loathing because I grew up thinking, if you criticize and despise yourself enough, that punishment would somehow change your behaviour. Well, it really wasn't helping - it was doing the opposite. I've been learning that compassion, forgiveness and kindness for oneself is the way to go, and it leads to hopefulness, optimism, and better choices... not perfectionism, though. That's unrealistic.
Anyway, this post ended up being a mini novel, so if you've read this far, thank you. It helps me to put my thoughts down in a concrete way to reinforce them to myself, and it's always gratifying to try to help anyone else who might be struggling.
I actually have more big news about my weight loss journey, but I'll save that for a separate post. Lol